There are so many great Instagram captions, from inspiring quotes to witty sayings. I’ll tell you more. I was going to make myself a belt made out of watches, but then I realized it would be a waste of time. Really?? Sleep for a while. I love to collect pictures of natural disasters. Mental stimulation and an emotional connection between two people trump a physical and love connection any day. I can tell by the hundred-plus Facebook selfies just how self-conscious you are about your looks. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name. I have a cattitude problem. Throughout, your life can find a person who never gets bore with your talks. When nature is your home, you don’t visit it. Truth is, I’m crazy for you. "It's hard to find a friend who's cute, loving, generous, caring, and smart. People who act like they know everything are very annoying to those of us who do. I can’t clean my room because I get distracted by the cool stuff I find! Just me. Broke his heart, then I asked if he was ok? DEJA POO: The feeling that you’ve heard this crap before. The idea is to die young . My only real long term goal is to never end up on Maury. Where you movin’? This life is hard, but it’s harder if you’re stupid. In a relationship? Happy Reading..!!! “I want to be like a caterpillar. Again. I have to stare at the ceiling and question every decision I’ve ever made. Sarcasm – the ability to insult idiots without them realizing it. Also food. Can I film you while you sleep? There comes a time when you have to stop crossing oceans for people who wouldn’t jump puddles for you. And everyone can see that but you. – Coco Chanel. I’m old enough to know better. When one door closes, another one opens. Are you always so stupid or is today a special ocassion? Happy National Selfie Day to someone whose face I’ve seen more than my own. Rabbits jump and they live for 8 years. Don’t give up on your dreams. Constantly taking selfies of yourself won’t make you prettier. How I feel when there is no coffee? DEPRESSO. Funny enough. Please don’t call.”, “Hey don’t be sad! However, having all of the above is even more powerful and meaningful; Even the most beautiful people will have at least some insecurity, whether they admit it or not. Sarcasm: Helping the intelligent politely tolerate the obtuse for thousands of years. My head says gym but my heart says tacos. Cute girl walking in front of you. Unfortunately, both never help in VIVA & INTERVIEW. Here are some of the most generic captions for every occasions. Because sad backwards is das—and das not good!”. It’s like punching people in the face but with words. There’s a girl out there with love in her eyes and flowers in her hair. I think you’ve got a deficiency of Vitamin Me! Just dropped my new single! Life is like a balloon. All you need to do? How do you call a pig that does karate? Me – “Mom, don’t you understand concept of gravity? Never let a man treat you anything less than Beyonce. Sometimes I need expert advice. I’d like to thank Red Bull, Google, Vodka, and Wikipedia for my graduation. Keep a smile on your face and let your personality be your autograph. My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot todo. Always remember that you’re unique. 87. Having a soft heart in a cruel world is courage, not weakness. That’s a game you can’t win. I KnOw I Have The Effect On People.. You hate me? THERE ARE 16 YEAR OLDS COMPETING AT THE OLYMPICS AND I STILL PUSH ON PULL DOORS…. I’m just intelligent beyond your understanding. Aye I’m just feeling my vibes right now, I’m feeling myself. My teacher pointed to me with his ruler and said: “At the end of this ruler there is an idiot!”…”I got detention after asking which end! – Audrey Hepburn. Respect you. Your continuous stream of self-portraits on Facebook is in no way indicative of a desperate cry for attention. Don’t post something crappy, pick a photo that best describes your friendship, and pick the perfect Funny Instagram captions to go with your funny moments. Even if I would come with instructions! Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest. This is the ultimate guide for a funny caption, including hilarious travel puns! If it comes back, it was meant to be. I liked memes before they were on Instagram. For every action, I have a clever reserve caption. With great power comes great electricity bills! My diet plan: make all of my best friends cookies; the fatter they get, the thinner I look. Some people always in a mood to upset others, they find different ways to hurt people. My life is a constant battle between my love for food and not wanting to get fat. We’re each responsible for the beauty we carry with us, ever day. Never give out all the information. You must be an amazing photographer. I really thought you already knew. I hate it when I’m singing a song and the artist gets the words wrong. – Unknown, A man says a lot of things in summer he doesn’t mean in winter. We’re on the same side now. Go wherever you feel most alive. Yeah, my selfie just got 24 likes. Friends knock on the door; best friends walk into your house and start eating. Fighting with me is like being in the special olympics. I don’t know how their arteries aren’t clogged with metal, because both of these girls have HEARTS OF GOLD. Stop worrying about the world ending today. People say nothing is impossible. Forget love, I’d rather fall in chocolate. Travel Puns and Insta Captions for Countries with the Letter P Peru. My dog is mad at me because they could smell another dog on my clothes. This too shall pass. We list a huge selection of the funniest captions for Instagram and photos to use. Treat yourself as a Queen, and you’ll attract a King. Please God, if you can’t make me thin, make my friends fat. What do people do with all the extra time they save by writing “k” instead of “ok”? Ready to explore? I am actually quite a nice person. Is Google a boy or a girl? I DON’T EVEN BELIEVE MYSELF WHEN I SAY I’LL BE READY IN 5 MINUTES. If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments. I don’t think outside the box either. Pork Chop. Now, there are two less fish in the sea. I’m not saying I hate you, what I’m saying is that you are literally the Monday of my life. Golden hour is my happy hour. I wouldn’t call them lies! There should be sympathy cards for having to go back to work after vacation. You don’t have to like me. Dude, all my friends have birthdays this year. It’s about who walked into your life and said, I am here for you and proved it. Oh, I clicked on my profile again. You may win, but in the end you’re still a retard. Funny Nature Captions for Instagram Branching out *insert tree emoji* Feeling good-natured. If we’re not meant to have midnight snacks, why is there a light in the fridge? I hope we are besties forever. I might have accomplished all three.”, “When people tell me, ‘You’re gonna regret that in the morning,’ I just sleep until noon. In the cartoon, the rest of Canada is covered in a blistery polar vortex, while B.C. Whenever you encountered in that situation where you want to convey a strong message to your opponent. A smile is a curve that sets everything straight. Are you really living a life or just paying the bills until you die? For your guidance, at one place we have got you covered Funny Sarcastic Instagram Captions that have a big impact on others. I was addicted to the hokey pokey but I turned myself around. Tis better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all. Get married.. My wife dresses to kill. It’s just a hill get over it. So, you’re on Instagram? You’re welcome.”, “Showing myself at my worst so the next selfie I post, you’ll all be astounded by my stunning transformation.”, “I’m probably going to regret this (in 3…2…1…).”, “Woke up like this. NEW DAY, NEW STRENGTH, NEW THOUGHTS. 90. I hope you dance like no one’s watching because they’re not – they’re taking selfies. Friendship isn’t about who you know the longest. Asher. Stay safe, eat cake! For a second I thought you weren’t a pathetic attention seeker. Friends buy you lunch. The question isn’t can you, it’s will you? If I wanted to kill myself I would climb your ego and jump to your IQ. If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, maybe it really is a duck. A human being without a friend is like a tree in a desert. Sometimes, someone comes into your life so unexpectedly, takes your heart by surprise, and changes your life forever. Keep on hating. A party without a cake is just a meeting. It went so well I went ahead and had all my hairs cut!”, “I call this the ‘Hey, at least I tried.’”, “The best things in life either make you fat, drunk, or pregnant. Look behind you see any eager faces, waiting for your next post? I am busy right now, can I ignore you some other time? Lesson learned. I made a huge list for today. Sometimes I have to tell myself it’s not worth the jail time. The selfies you don’t post are what you really look like – ugly. Music gets louder. The word “studying” was made up of two words originally “students dying”. Buy an iPhone they said, it comes with a map, they said. 8 Selfie Captions For Girls. At night I become a bit more open-minded. I wish everybody had one. These are the top 22 funny dog memes on the entire internet (or... at least just our favorites). Haya I love this girl captions collection. Unless you’re a banana. My neighbor’s diary says that I have boundary issues. Three mistake did by everyone. I love my six pack so much, I protect it with a layer of fat. People won’t always love you. From short and funny quips, to song lyrics, romantic quotes, and even lines from rom-coms, we found some perfectly cute couples captions for Instagram to broadcast your love. You jump off a really tall cliff. I eat cake because it’s somebody’s birthday somewhere. Make it simple, make it short! If you love something, let it go. Life was much easier when apple and blackberry were just fruits. Boys will be boys as long as there are no girls in the picture. I need a six-month holiday, twice a year. Fasten your seatbelts, it’s going to be a bumpy night! Maybe if we tell people the brain is an app, they’ll start using it. I am on a seafood diet. Life is a banquet, and most poor suckers are starving to death! Dogs run and they live for 15 years. F.R.I.E.N.D.S. If at first, you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you. If there would be an award for laziness, I would send someone to pick it up for me! My mom – Why is everything in your room on the floor? But I do nothing every day! 75% of my humor starts with a bad photograph. THEY ARE HARD TO COME BY. Need you. Neither does this picture.”, “How do I get out of this glass prison? (Okay, and that trip where you ate the sketchy seafood and couldn’t figure out how to flush the toilets in Morocco. If you fall, I will be there. That awkward moment when you see twins fighting and one of them calls the other ugly. Of course not! Let’s just stay friends=never talk again. An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but if doctor is cute, forget the fruit. These two weirdos are perfect for each other. The biggest challenge in life is being yourself…in a world trying to make you like everyone else. Look at me, now look at you. Got a new phone today, my old phone failed the swimming test. What if I told you, you can eat without posting it on Instagram. I am not feeling lazy actually; I am just incredibly motivated to do nothing. My demons hide in my loudness. I have two speeds. I May Look Calm But In My Mind I Have Killed You Three Times. Uh, no. I want to sleep like my husband! Please? I can barely remember what I had for lunch yesterday. Funny Sarcastic Instagram Captions. Even the cake is in tiers. Follow your heart, but take your brain with you. Always remember that you’re unique. Don’t take life too seriously. So if anyone asks, I am outstanding! Because anyone else heard our conversations we’d end up in the mental hospital. Dear Haters, I have so much more for you to be mad at…Just be patient. Girls just wanna have sun. Why is it that we tend to take relationships for granted? You miss one day, Beyonce shows up unannounced. There may be no excuse for laziness, but I’m still looking. The happiest people don’t have the best of everything, they make the best of everything. Birthdays are good for you. It happens accidentally, in a heartbeat, in a single flashing, throbbing moment. We’ve also rounded up some short Instagram captions for you, when time is of the essence. The older you get, the better you get. I don’t believe in plastic surgery. So much thought goes into clicking the perfect picture, to overcome issues with the lighting, the angles…it is a work of art! Girls like my smiley face because I clean my teeth thrice a day. Puts selfie on top of tree because I’m the star. You must be so healthy. We organized all the greatest captions for your Instagram shots. Not today Satan, not today. “I miss you like an idiot misses the point.”. Friends are medicine for a wounded heart. Scenery Captions For Instagram. 11 One Word Captions for Girls. Choose your topic and your favorite quote – and copy and paste it under your Insta-photo update! No, your garden gnome doesn’t count (he has a hat).”, “We broke up for religious reasons—he believed he was God and I didn’t.”, “It’s complicated—our drink order, that is. Long caption from my close friends and short of others. A beautiful woman delights the eye; a wise woman, the understanding; a pure one, the soul. Hello modelling agency? Teacher knows who my crush is, assigns my seat next to her. Still looking for happiness in the same place you just lost it. 300 Quotes to cheer you up today and every day! Sometimes I wish I was a bird. —. I have a case of wanderlust. Unfortunately, so is the pizza place. I stopped fighting my inner demons. Exactly. Funny Animal Memes With Captions and Funny Pictures and Be stupid, be dumb, be funny, if that’s who you are. Cute as a button, but not quite as smart. I literally have to remind myself all the time that being afraid of things going wrong isn’t the way to make things go right. Know what it’s made of? I’mma sip it ‘til i feel it, I’mma smoke it ‘til it’s done. LIfe: Lol, wait a sec. But love neglected is the start of indifference. Dear sleep: thanks for trying, but you can’t beat surfing the net. I’m as mad as hell, and I’m not going to take this anymore! Check out some of these side-splittingly funny captions below, remember to upvote your fave ones, and read through Bored Panda's interview with the main moderator of the subreddit, Xalaxis! 91. There are two rules in life. Friends are like flowers, they add color to your life..!! Read – Short Instagram Caption for Friends (Funny, Cute, Taunts) Witty Instagram Captions For Selfies. To streamline the process, here's a list of funny Instagram captions to use on New Year's Day so all you have to do is copy, paste, and send. I never gave you a reason to hate me. And a chair. ... A catchy caption is greatly important to bring the reader into view of the post. I think something’s missing in my life. Girls be like, caught off guard but still cute. Live the live you want to, not the one you’re supposed to. Well, well, well. Make sure to savor all your special moments, step outside of yourself, and bask in your own presence, while it’s still present. I feel so miserable without you, it’s almost like having you here. Why should I disillusion them? What the duck – I don’t even know what box everyone is talking about. I look at people sometimes and think ….. Be with those that bring out the best in you, not the stress in you. You do the most adorable things without realizing. Dear vegetarians, if you’re trying to save animals, then why are you eating their food? 9 Cool Captions For Girls. Just stop. picture of me and accidentally posted this, I’m so embarrassed! It’s like punching people in the face but with words. Let’s take some of them and make it our funny Instagram captions for our photos. it’s called Monday, please fix it. The more people I meet, the more I love my cat. 86. If you don’t like this one, you’re definitely not going to like the other one. You keep using that word, I don’t think it means what you think it means. It’s funny how people judge other’s mistakes while they also do the same thing. Love how some people try to get you down. Friends are the family we choose for ourselves. If I had a flower for every time I thought of you…I could walk through my garden forever. Worst two minutes of my life!”. – Betty Williams, A vacation is having nothing to do and all day to do it in. We share handwritten guides to boost your Social Media Marketing genuinely. Not all girls are made of sugar and spice, and everything nice. Invite me to play Candy Crush one more time. Ans: Yeah, bro, all 10 seasons on DVD. I don’t think inside the box. Old people know that this is correct. Free hot dogs and chili, you always pay for them later. Some people are like clouds. Friendship isn’t a big thing. Reply. First I drink the coffee. Taking a funny selfie isn’t easy, so it’s important to really nail it with the caption to get your point across. A Queen, and everything nice check your phone and it ’ s a beautiful woman delights eye. 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